


Her Husband Had Committed Adultery

by Queenafoster



Category: The Big Valley
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-02
Updated: 2017-07-02
Packaged: 2018-11-22 04:38:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,445
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11372739
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Queenafoster/pseuds/Queenafoster
Summary: Victoria's thoughts over the years





	Her Husband Had Committed Adultery

 

Her husband had committed adultery.  Been with another woman who was not his wife.

She'd suspected as much.  Even before he left Stockton, there was distance between them.  She didn't know if it was something she'd done...or not done...or if something had changed in how he felt about her.  She just knew their relationship was different.  And never before had he been gone so long without a word.  Nothing for weeks.  After a while, Victoria began to wonder if he was coming back.

She knew of women whose husbands had left...and never returned.  Women who were talked about behind their backs, pitied for their inability to keep a man at home.  She'd never dreamed she might become one of them.  Their relationship was so strong, so fulfilling.  Had once been so passionate.  And the ranch had such a draw on Tom's ambitions that Victoria had never considered that he might just leave.  And as soon as she thought that, she began to wonder if she really wanted a man who stayed with her only because of their property. 

The boys, they didn't understand.  They knew Father was on a business trip, but all they cared about was his return.  Victoria had run out of answers.  Jarrod was a bright little man, and his eyes were beginning to be skeptical when Mother became evasive.

Then one day, out of the blue, Tom's horse came trotting through the gate.  Jarrod and Nick were all over him, unable to get enough, but Victoria held back, unsure of his feelings.  Unsure of her own.

But he was attentive.  Loving.  Playful even.  He was once again the sweet young man who'd courted her, stealing her heart in a matter of weeks.  And while she had suspicions regarding his recent whereabouts and activities, she decided not to raise them.  _Her_ Tom was back, and he was once again the man she'd fallen in love with a decade earlier.

He threw himself into the ranch and the side ventures they'd invested in.  He'd always been an advocate of diversification, preaching that if anything ever happened to one investment, the others would keep them afloat.  They had invested in timber and orchards, a vineyard, shipping, mining, and of course, the ranch.

But Tom quite suddenly decided to sell their interest in the Strawberry mine.  Victoria initially disagreed as the mine still had solid output and good quality ore.  But he was adamant, and Victoria began to suspect that there might be another reason to sell their shares.  So, again, she kept her own counsel, conceded to Tom's judgment, and they divested of Strawberry altogether.  As in the way of most things, Tom's decision to sell their shares turned out to be favorable.  Not too long after, output began to fall off significantly, and the ore became somewhat shoddy.  And if Victoria's mind rested just a bit easier that he would never have reason to return to the small mining town, well, that was a nice turn of events as well.

And they were happy--happier than ever before.  Victoria became pregnant twice more and miscarried both babies.  She was beginning to think their family was complete when Audra finally came along, followed soon after by Eugene.

Victoria was beyond content.  She couldn't imagine needing or wanting more.  Years passed.  A war was fought and their older sons returned home safe and sound.  They owned one of the largest, most successful ranches in the San Joaquin Valley; they had a growing family that kept them busy.  It was more than she'd ever dreamed of.

And then suddenly, the light went out.  One morning her husband left to help some of their neighbors...and didn't come home.  This time, she didn't have to wonder or suspect; she saw his body, caressed his cold, lifeless skin, sank into a dark hole of emptiness at his loss.

But she couldn't stay there, of course.  Their children needed her.  Audra rebelled.  Gene withdrew.  And though Jarrod and Nick were grown men and very capable, the Barkley Empire was huge.  Tom had learned its management as it was built, but now it was suddenly thrust into hands that had always had someone to guide them.  That someone was now gone, and they were staggering under the responsibility.  So Victoria forced herself out of her melancholy to pull the family back together.

She mourned her husband.  Even more, she grieved him, missing him in all the simple ways a person misses her best friend.  Like when she wanted to ask his opinion on a new dress.  Or when she heard a joke he would've loved.  Or when she thought of an old, much loved memory the two of them shared.  She just _missed_ him.

Then late one night, several years after Tom's death, the old suspicion came back to haunt her.  She overheard Nick, outraged, in the study, demanding his brothers' immediate presence.  Bits and pieces of heated discussion drifted up the stairs.  She could not stop herself from cracking the bedroom door to listen.  Her sons and another young man were arguing, making demands and ugly accusations.  And...she _knew_.  Not in any way that could be proven, but she knew.  As she had always known.

Her husband had committed adultery.  Been with another woman who was not his wife.

She didn't actually see the young man till later that night when the railroad--the very people who had murdered her husband--burned the house of a neighbor.  She watched as her sons--her darling boys, so like their father in quite different ways--argued the issues involved.  The whole time she prayed that they would take the same stand as their father so that he would not have died in vain.  Nick, so strong and righteous, standing with their neighbors.  Eugene, pulled in both directions by his older brothers, but finally siding with Nick.  Jarrod, the one most concerned with law and order and finding a way through the chaos with his humanity intact.  Eventually, his sense of justice and love of family held sway, and he stood alongside his brothers.

But before this final decision, she saw the previously unknown young man ride away.  She had noted his arrival with Audra, but there was no time to investigate.  However, as soon as Jarrod took his place with his brothers, she followed the young man, determined to finally face the proof of what she'd always known.  She found him in their parlor, taking the money Jarrod had earlier offered.  Then he swiped a hat full of apples.  In these actions, she glimpsed another aspect of her husband that she'd never seen in any of her own children: the practical survivor who understood that something was better than nothing; the pragmatist who realized that cash in hand and an apple in his saddle bag might be all that stood between him and disaster; a young man with dark blond hair like Gene and blue eyes like Audra who might well favor his father more than any of her own children.

Her worst fears were standing in front of her, proof of her husband's long ago dalliance.  And...he was just a nice looking young man.  A man like any other.  Not a devil with horns or a monster trying to destroy her world.  If she'd correctly heard the argument in the study, he was a young man without any roots or family.  Essentially, a man with nothing...when she had so much.

So, after a lifetime of both facing and ignoring her demons, she took a deep breath and gave him what little wisdom she had.  She felt his palpable resentment for the man responsible for his place in the world, but she also understood that his appearance on the ranch demonstrated a deep need for connection with someone-- _anyone--_ even the family of his detested father.  But he didn't respond, and she thought she'd failed to reach him.  Or that his anger was just too strong to accept her overture.  He left the ranch, and she expected that he was probably gone from their lives for good. 

But the following morning, her sons went to the Semple Farm and faced the men who'd taken her husband, and when they came back, the young man was with them.  He'd stood beside his brothers, unwilling to let them face the railroad's hired thugs without him.  And the appearance of four exhausted, filthy young men--all sons of Thomas Barkley--filled her with gratitude not only because they all returned home, more or less hale and hearty, but also because they'd defeated their father's nemesis.

It was lucky that the fight at the Semple Ranch was both early and quick, for the Barkleys had much to discuss.  Victoria took charge of the newcomer, giving him the guest room and making sure he had towels and water to clean up.  Then she went to help Audra with Jarrod's injury and left Nick and Gene to Silas's care.  For a short while, the house was fairly peaceful.

After a quick, mostly silent lunch, they repaired to the study.  At that point, it was good that all the windows and doors were closed as the discourse became quite heated.  She started off by telling her children and their guest that she was aware of the young man's heritage and background, and they could all stop tip-toeing around her.  Nick and Gene looked shocked and embarrassed, but Jarrod merely nodded slightly, a tip of his proverbial hat.  Of course, Audra had been on the staircase during the argument the previous night, and she knew that Victoria had overheard their argument.

Victoria's second statement was probably even more bewildering; she told them that they should invite the young man--Heath--to become part of their family.  Complete and utter astonishment would be the most charitable description of the general reaction. 

Jarrod:  even this most open-minded of her children apparently had limits on what he considered an acceptable response...and what he believed his mother could tolerate.  But after hearing Victoria's statement of resolve, his sense of fairness eventually won out.  He tended to fight for the underdog, and he had little patience when he believed someone was being attacked unjustly.  Heath's appearance at the Semple farm and Victoria's quiet recognition and acceptance of the newcomer finally swayed him.

Nick:  her least open-minded child, the one most in awe of his father, the most stubborn, certainly the loudest.  He argued long and hard against Heath's inclusion.  He brought up many salient points regarding Heath's lack of evidence and Nick's own general belief that Tom was the most saintly man on Earth.  Finally, he even pointed out that Heath's existence would cause gossip, but Victoria was quick to state how little that truly mattered.  She pointed out that Nick himself certainly couldn't care less what people thought of him.  But she also understood that his father's reputation was a completely different issue.  In the end, he was simply outvoted.

Heath:  after the heated confrontation the previous night, Victoria almost expected him to make more demands.  Instead, his only contribution was to vehemently defend his mother against Nick's slanderous attacks and to state categorically that he was Heath _Barkley_.  On this day, he never officially requested a stake in the ranch or an inheritance.  Perhaps he was aware that Victoria's stance changed his position somewhat.  Maybe he was cowed by her presence.  Or possibly he was more clever than she had first thought, realizing that silence was a far better weapon against Nick's loud declarations.

Audra:  after her initial wonder at Victoria's suggestion, she quickly put her support behind Heath--to the family's _complete_ surprise.  Audra had become a bit of a tomboy after her father's death, and she tended to be quite unladylike at inappropriate times.  From the responses of her brothers, they clearly expected her to adamantly side with Nick...but she didn't.  Victoria didn't know exactly where she and Heath had been when they showed up at the Swenson house, but she decided it didn't really matter.  Whatever had happened, Heath had clearly won her over.

Gene:  the youngest and most impressionable.  He always had a hard time when Jarrod and Nick argued different sides.  Jarrod tended to go easy on his youngest brother, knowing how difficult he found their disagreements, but Nick had no such scruples.  In the study that afternoon and evening, Nick knew he was losing and pulled out all the stops.  Unfortunately for him, Gene's sense of fairness won the day.  Perhaps it was Heath's appearance at the Semple Farm.  Or his lack of further demands.  Maybe it was Jarrod and Audra's support.  Gene occasionally looked to Victoria herself, but she had already given her opinion.  Gene was a man now and able to make his own decision.  And he eventually decided that Heath should have a place in their family.

So, it was settled.  Twenty-four years after the fact, there was a fourth Barkley son, and Victoria could now acknowledge what she'd always believed.

Her husband had committed adultery.  Been with another woman who was not his wife.

The following months were challenging.  Nick continued to resist Heath's presence even if he no longer doubted his paternity.  Heath represented Tom's error in judgment, and for Nick, that symbolism was unacceptable.  Their relationship continued to be rocky and difficult until Heath literally saved the family's (and Nick's) reputation by completing a cattle drive under extreme circumstances after Nick was injured. 

Shortly thereafter, Nick started to thaw.  They didn't become immediate bosom buddies, but Nick began to perceive the honorable young man who was now his brother.  Slowly, their relationship even grew to rival that of Nick and Jarrod.  In time, the two of them shared much that the rest of the family knew very little about.  Nick was king of the ranch, and Heath his strong right hand, ready and willing to do almost anything Nick asked...yet never hesitating to say his piece if it had bearing on any situation, regardless of whether Nick wanted to hear it or not.  Not many men felt comfortable standing up to Nick Barkley, but Heath generally said what he thought.  Nick learned to listen.  They were a well-balanced team.  

Heath and Victoria had initially been careful in their interactions, neither of them wanting to say or do anything that might upset their unspoken understanding.  Then had come the fateful trip to Strawberry.  For twenty-four years, she'd known of Tom's infidelity.  Daily interaction with Heath had renewed the long-buried doubts she had always concealed.  On the day that Stockton turned out to honor her husband's memory, she couldn't bring herself to go one more second without finding out the whole story.  When she arrived in that dead mining town and met the vile parasites who were Heath's aunt and uncle, she completely understood why he'd discouraged her visit.  After they made clear threats against her, she'd felt very real fear...until Heath's sudden arrival.  She'd not experienced such relief since her boys had returned from the Semple farm.  That day in Strawberry--just the two of them--had solidified their relationship and turned him into _her_ fourth son.

Now, it seemed they had reached another crossroads.

A man named Charlie Sawyer had appeared a few days earlier.  Heath claimed he was there regarding a piece of land in Strawberry, and the two of them needed to clarify the issue in person.  So, they rode off toward Heath's hometown.  Victoria had detected a hint of reluctance in this quiet son, but there were many depths of Heath that she'd never plumbed.  He also had a habit of trying to protect her when the subject of his mother came up.  Thus, she let him go without pushing for an explanation, hoping that he would confide when he returned.

But she could never have imagined the horrifying reality he presented them when he came back.  Audra asked about the property he'd gone to investigate, and he suddenly began recounting his arrival at the ranch based on the belief that Tom was his father.  Victoria didn't understand why he needed to bring all that up until he announced that he wasn't a Barkley--he was a Sawyer.  It felt like her world was crumbling all over again even as she understood how it destroyed him to say, "Charlie Sawyer is my father."  He immediately climbed the stairs, and she knew without a doubt that he planned to gather a few things and leave.  She could not let that happen.

In the year since his arrival, the family had forged a path through a changed landscape.  Six Barkleys instead of five.  New challenges and problems...and a new ally that they'd all come to depend on without question.  He'd faced every trial beside his new family, and they'd emerged stronger because of him.  After all the struggles and triumphs, she could not let him leave.

The family gave it their all.  Jarrod and Nick made the first attempt, Jarrod pointing out that Sawyer had no proof, and Nick saying that none of the Barkleys could ever treat Heath as less than brother or son, and that Heath wasn't giving them any say in a decision that would ultimately rip the family apart.  Jarrod, God bless him, even offered to make the change from 'Thomson' to 'Barkley' legal and permanent which they'd never before considered necessary.

But Heath--solid, dependable, honest--would not let any argument dissuade him.  Even though his heart was clearly breaking, he was set on leaving.  Victoria refused to let him go without stating a few facts, especially when he brought up that old saw of _charity_.  As if he hadn't earned everything they'd provided him!  Victoria had mourned her dead husband and she'd grieved for the man he once was, but she'd accepted his infidelity and made the results of Tom's betrayal a part of her heart and her life.  Blood or not, Heath had become a Barkley, and that could not be undone.  Whatever he called himself, he was now part of them, and they were part of him.

But none of their arguments had any effect.  He thanked them for everything and left.

In the void, Jarrod, Nick, and Audra talked about what to do.  Victoria just wondered what she could have said to change his mind.  All that old history was done, over with; she just wanted to forget it and move on.  But it just wouldn't stay buried.  She was so angry and heartsick, furious with Tom for leaving her with this mess.  He should have done more, fixed this before dying.  She was angry with Leah because she hadn't demanded more from Tom for their son.  And yet, despite all this anger at two people who weren't there to receive her righteous indignation, she couldn't help but be grateful to them for producing the young man who'd just broken her heart.  The young man who'd fought his way into the family but was now certain that he'd done so under false pretenses.

In almost no time, Nick and Jarrod decided to go after him.  The lawyer in Jarrod would not concede a case on such flimsy evidence, and Nick just resolved that Heath couldn't go without a fight--a literal brawl if that's what it took to bring him home.  They went after him...and met Heath on his way back, Charlie Sawyer half dead on Heath's horse.

The wound was plainly mortal.  Audra went for the doctor, but it was clear that Sawyer would not survive.  Nick was still attending the horses when Sawyer told them he wasn't Heath's father.  He confessed that he'd been gone two years before Heath was born.  Of course, Charlie Sawyer was a confidence man to the core and could have been lying, but Victoria could not figure what he might gain at this point.  The man knew he was dying, and his last words were a wish that the fine man at his bedside really had been his son.  Regardless, Victoria chose to believe that he was telling the truth...a truth that would make her family whole again.

Her husband had committed adultery.  Been with another woman who was not his wife.

The humble, resourceful, honorable man born from that coupling now belonged to Victoria and her family.  Her anger at Tom and Leah could not stand in the face of what she'd gained from their union.  Whatever had happened in the past was done, gone and buried, and the Barkleys--all of them--would move forward as a family.


End file.
